She Couldn't Be Quit

There was just one thing missing in my life, and I went hunting for a beautiful, young, and trendy girlfriend. Hope springs eternal.Hope was her name.We met at the top of Mt. Si on a Saturday afternoon, looking across the lowlands toward Puget Sound. We hiked back down the mountain together and shared a drink at a cozy North Bend watering hole. Much to my surprise and delight, we spent the night in my trendy, downtown apartment. Smart, funny, and beautiful, Hope was twelve years my junior; but we made each other happy and, clearly, that is what mattered. Within two months, Hope had moved in with me and I couldn’t have been more pleased.Having eye-candy on my arm at company gatherings added to my status among my male coworkers. For her part, Hope liked the gatherings because she was drawn to power like a magnet. Power that comes from money, position, and oh, yes, did I mention money? Hope liked people who were powerful, they got her into doors and then she left them behind. She loved. He cant be agoody-goody, but he cant be a total asshole either, unless he then getswhat's coming to him.So whose our main character? Well, why not a writer? Hay, if StevenFricking King can write about a writer who is suspiciously like him,basically jerk off in public and get paid for it, why cant I?So our main character is like me, that's fine. What can we have happento him? Well, its been a while since I did anything kinda spooky, so whynot say he gets cursed? Yeh, that works, a curse is always a winner.A curse from .... A Goddess!Oh wow, that's good, that way the publisher has an excuse to put somebikini babe on the cover, that kind of thing helps sales at the busterminals.So we got a curse from a goddess, what kind of curse should it be? Oldbuddy Steve-O there made a mint having a guy get cursed to lose weight,which doesnt sound very scary to me, but what do I know?So what curse? What could this guy-like-me lose that would really scarehim?What about his manhood?Oh .. . that might.
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