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Mat immediately sits up, Abby’s legs across his lap. She’s taken aback by his sudden posture, the hard look on his face.“I’m afraid of pushing you too far.” His deep voice keeps her silent. “I do like being this way with you, Abigail, but I have to control myself. If we do make this about me, we may end up doing things that… you might not like.” Mat watches her every nuance as she processes his words. Mostly she’s curious how deep a gutter his mind really is. What kind of stuff does he want to do with her? Haven’t they done a lot already?“Maybe I will like it.” Those are the words she decides on. Mat closes his eyes, inhaling slowly.“Just because you may like it doesn’t mean we should do it.”“Why?” Mat opens his eyes.“Because this isn’t about me.”“If you’re trying to make this about me, then give me what I want.”“What do you want?”“For you to give in!” They glare at each other, Abby’s words lingering between them.“I want you to stop keeping yourself from me, to stop holding back. You. On the way home, as Karla drove, and I sat in the passenger seat, she said, "Well, Jenna's all married up, now. I guess she and Damien'll be making sweet music together before long." She chuckled, and added, "I guess that's what weddings are all about, you know, romance, love, yada yada yada," and then she added, like it was an afterthought, "making love." She turned to smile at me, like she was waiting for a reply, and then looked back at the road, but I didn't answer. I didn't think I had much to offer on the subject of marriage.After a moment, Karla went on with, "Come on, Al, I'm trying to get a conversation going over here, but you're not helping much. I'm getting sore gums from flapping them." She only ever called me Al when she was fooling around with me like that, because she knew I preferred being called Allan."After my experience with marriage, I don't think I've got much to say about that subject," I said, keeping my tone light, and ending with a smile, so I didn't sound.
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