I'll admit that I was petrified. After a couple of excruciatingly long hours, an opening appeared in the wall farthest from me. I hadn't noticed any door before that, but nevertheless, light and warmth poured through the new pathway. Slowly, I got to my feet and stepped through it. I wonder now if I was really in control of myself at the time. I slowly paced down a narrow, brightly lit metallic hallway, making note of the sharp contrast between the immaculate architectural perfection of my current surroundings and the dingy cell I had been in moments before. The hallway led to a door. It looked to me like something from a James Bond film as it opened like an iris with a whoosh. I stepped in. What I saw next told me that my worst fears had been dead-on. Before me stood three perfectly clear cylindrical tanks. They reached all the way up to the considerably high ceiling of the room and had tubes and wires protruding in spades from both their tops and their base. Lights and knobs were. Drink, breathe, drink, breathe, wait, drink, breathe ... All week me and Adam have been at it! Like I said, he’s a brilliant math man. He came up with this system that takes into account the amount of time left until the show, the person’s size, and the alcohol desentif—depensi—Aw, fuck...” He turned to Adam. “What the hell is it, dude, ‘depissification rate’?”All of us guffawed as Adam grinned back at us.“Dissipation rate!” he yelled back.Jonah gave him a thumbs up. “Thanks, chief,” he called, his eyes glinting as he turned to us again. “Yeah, that. Anyway, the bottom line is that we have a system so that we can let in just the right crowd!”Fucking Jonah ... The guy has flair, in his own crazy way... “So, do we have to take the test before we can go in?” Tommy asked, taking a long sip of his beer.“Of course!” Jonah joked.“And does it by chance have an Irish mode? Otherwise, I fear we’ll be a five-piece tonight, because—”Tommy was drowned out by our raucous laughing.“Ooh, how about.
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