When breakfast was over I got up and refilled everyone’s coffee cup. The boys quickly cleared the table and sat down to finish their second cup of coffee with downcast eyes. They were waiting for Cindy or me to say something about last night for good or ill. After a minute of complete silence, I decided it was time for someone to start the conversation.I looked directly at Brian and Tony and said. “Cindy and I talked this morning and we do not have any regrets about what happened last night.”The change in Brian and Tony’s body language was remarkable. It was like they were holding their breath and then let it out and melted into a slouch in their chairs.Cindy looked at the boys and asked, “What we need to know now is if you have any regrets? Brian you first. Do you have any regrets or second thought about what we did last night?”Brian looked at Tony and Tony nodded and gestured to let him know it was okay to go ahead and tell the truth.Brian turned to me and said, “I am sorry I did. They’d never been to a funeral, or seen anyone buried before, but they had learned about it from the books Rose and Clarissa taught them from.“Daddy, we don’t have a preacher for her, but I want to say something,” Kia said as Little Eli held the cross they had made, and Ezra drove it into the ground.“I do too, Daddy, she was so good to us, like she really was our momma,” Michi said, sobbing.“You girls go right ahead, we all loved her and now you know how much she loved you,” Eli said, wiping his eyes.“God, this is Michi Crow. I lost my real momma and daddy a long time ago and I hope they’re up there with you now. I’m a Crow girl now and I love my family. We don’t know if you like goats enough to let them in heaven, but if you do, we want you to take this nanny up there. She was more than just a goat, she fed us and watched over us when we were little and we all loved her, thank you God,” Michi said as she bent over the grave and wept.“God, this is Kia Crow. Michi and I don’t remember.
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