" Baby--look. Look at me." I look into his deep dark face. All these issues you have. Trust me, we'll get there. But we need to learn to love like normal people first. Take care of each other." But I already do love you so much daddy!" And I start to hug him. But before I do...SMACK. Right in my face! I bleed a little where my big teeth cut my lip. But I wanted him to do that, so it's okay."Goddamnit Hannah I told you to stop with this shit. This shit is fucked up!" I’m sorry…" Karajan looks at me firm again. "I didn't mean to, honest!" I lie. Then I gave him a little smile and we rub our noses together. We suck on the blood creeping down my lip. It tastes really good."That’s a good girl. I love you Hannahbanana." I love you too Da…" Don’t even." Okay!"Now Karajan hits the play button again. Karajan likes to watch the 1968 Franco Zephirelli Romeo & Juliet on VHS tape constantly. Everyday. I think it’s kind of weird, honestly--and even pedophilic--but just a. I bury it in my purse and floor it down the freeway to the hotel. I spot my bell boy in the parking lot, waiting nervously in the shade of a large oak tree on the side most distant from the entrance. He looks quite a bit younger than I remember, now he’s in cargo shorts and a t-shirt rather than his hotel uniform. I consider turning around, but decide that between the texts confirming he’s 18 and the fact that I’m female the chances of any serious trouble are slim. Besides, I can think of a few rather inventive ways to make sure he keeps quiet. I pull up to the tree:“Hi, I’m Miss Santos. Hop in”“H-hi” he gets in the passenger seat“You gonna tell me your name, or shall I just call you ‘bell boy’?”He grins nervously. He reeks of Ax, like he just doused himself with half a can. A shower when we get in, I think.“James Cooper. James. My friends call me Jimmy”“Well, Jimmy, you ready to go?”He nods slightly hesitantly. We drive in silence for about 10 minutes until we hit the freeway. I.
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