Then the job finished, the attic complete. It had taken Bernie’s expertise to finish it off, which made me petulant and pouty because his presence meant I couldn’t get at Mrs Hallam.It was an emotional time for me. I was halfway in love with Mrs Hallam by then. I told her and we had a deep and meaningful in her bed. It was the last time I’d see Mrs Hallam’s glorious body naked again. It was over, but she sent me away after gently explaining how it could only have been what it was. I was young, she was too old. She was married and had no intention or even an inkling to leave her husband.“I’m not going to betray him again,” Mrs Hallam said through a sigh. “This past week or so has been wonderful, Jason. You’re a gorgeous, sweet, beautiful man.” She smirked and nudged me and took the potential for my emotional response away by adding, “And you come like a firehose, darling. And I hope you’ve learned something about how to treat a lady.”She kissed me and rolled away. I smacked her bottom. Part of me feltsorry for myself that I'd never again be able to make loveto these beautiful women but also for them, that we'd neveragain be able to share that which was so wonderful for allthree of us. I so desperately wanted to talk about it, too,at least part of me did, but it was the other part of methat was too ashamed to do so that prevented me fromunburdening myself to any of these four great friends. ThusI was relegated to suffering this alone, lost in my self-imposed misery.Physically, it wasn't until the doctor removed the cathetershe'd had to put in during my emergency surgery that I wasto discover I was now unable to pee standing up any longer,at least without dribbling all over myself. Well, at leastif I was dressed, I could still do okay in just thehospital gown but it just wasn't long enough any more toreach outside a pair of slacks. Then there was, andoccasionally still is, the dull ache in my groin where mynow missing balls used to reside and this even while I.
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