" He shruggedsheepishly, "To be honest now I've got over the shock I?m kind ofrelieved that Kathy?s gone." I could hear the hint of anger in hisvoice, "She hated being the way she was and loathed what the morphinethey were giving to her for the pain was doing to her mind, one of thelast things she told me before pain meds rendered her insensible wasif she known she would end like this she would have gone to Dignitasbefore she got too sick to travel."Not knowing what else to say I told him, "When I ordered my dressesand underwear I sized them to match your suggestions so they'll fit mewith the breasts you?ve got me for Christmas." And your presents from me?" Steven asked showing a little moreanimation in his tone."They arrived last weekend and are in my cupboard with my newoutfits." I told him with a blush."Have you tried them yet?" He asked."I?ve not even opened them." I admitted, "I wanted to save them untilI start my holiday next week and had time to dress up properly." You look. And after all these years we’ve never pushedour fantasies on each other, even though I’ve voicedthem in the past, and now you so readily use them tomake me feel ill at ease, but still, you never botheredhelping out mine, so I won’t help yours now.” I feltlike the victor, that I had put her in her place.She said to John, “D’you see how much he wants to besandwiched between you and me?” John just shrugged andI went off into the bathroom.My heart was beating rapidly and my muscles were alljittery. I paced the tile with thousands of thoughtsshouting down my reason. I imagined her motives andassumed that our marriage was falling apart. I wonderedif she ever loved me, if she was just playing a roleand waiting for me to die so she could get my lifeinsurance. Maybe she was secretly and slowly trying tokill me. Maybe the pot was laced with poison. Icouldn’t remember if I had seen either of the othersactually take in a hit. Were they doing some.
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