It was like a kick in the teeth. Deflation.“Wasn’t she sweet?”Mum gushed and squeezed my arm excitedly. We sat, half way back in the audience in the middle, watching my mum’s friend Sarah’s little girl, Flo, perform ballet. A whole class of little girls were doing ballet and the synchronization was awful. I had waved and nodded at Sarah, sitting down in the front row, as we’d taken our seats. The audience was mostly mums, plenty of siblings, a handful of henpecked dads, and no other boys my age.I shrugged. No amount of fondness for my mum or for Sarah or even little Flo was going to make me think Flo was good at ballet. None of the little girls were. I didn’t understand why they’d want anyone to see them try and do it. More wounded duck than Swan Lake.“Yeah, sweet,” I admitted diplomatically. “So, can we go now?”Mum squeezed my arm even tighter. “You haven’t got to the good bit, yet”“Oh, there’s more?”“I might be here to support Flo, but you’re here for a completely different purpose. No wonder I was ‘saturnine’ during my teenage years. I vaguely remembered that there should have been something more inside my book, something very personal and hopefully after all these years amusing to read. Where was it, though? I kept flipping the pages, two, three, ten, twenty at the time. The book was more voluminous that I had expected. It seemed like I had acquired a mass of computer data information and wrote it down for future reference. Then, I remembered what I used to do when writing secret things down. I closed the diary and with the back cover facing me, turned it upside down. Now I opened it again and bingo. Here was what I had been looking for. My clandestine life, hidden from my family and usually from most of my friends, too. To an untrained eye, the writings were a complete nonsense. To a person with passion for puzzles it would have been instantly clear that this was written in a code. My own – not hard to break, should someone take time and effort to do so..
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