9. I don't approve of political jokes, I've seen too many of them get elected.10. There are two sides to every divorce, his and the shithead bitch's - opps I mean witch's.11. I love being married, it's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.12. I am a nobody and nobody is perfect, therefore, I am perfect.13. Every day I beat my own previous record for number of consecutive days I've stayed alive.14. How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America???15. Having a smoking section in a restaurant like having a peeing section in a swimming pool.16. Why is it that most nudists are people you don't want to see naked.17. Snowmen fall from Heaven unassembled.18. Every time I walk into a singles bar I can hear Mom's wise words, "Don't pick that up, you don't know where it's been."19. A good friend will come and bail you out of jail, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Damn, that was fun."These are. .bitch please I live for this, he loves it, he prefers me to you because he knows I know how to please a man, otherwise why is he calling me to meet me alone????That period was fun then came shemales, I have always love shemales, always have thought they are so beautiful and I remember that night, it was a few days before halloween, saturday afternoon, alone in my room when I finally got the nerve to pick up the phone and call that add, the one I had been staring for weeks in the back of the phoenix, it was time for me to meet a shemale.She lived on Beacon street, i remeber being all nervous walking over there but that all evaporated when she opened the door, she wore a black bra, thong, thigh highs and heels and was beautiful, she invited me in and had me sit on the bed, got me undressed and then laid me on the bed while we watched a porn and then all of a sudden she kissed me, she stuck her tongue in my mouth and i remember feeling so at peace and thing "this is totally worth it" my.
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