I'd never once heard her say 'cock'."Are you feeling all right, mom?" I'm feeling alive is what I'm feeling, Patrick." Holy crap. This was too weird."No, I... I don't think you are. I don't think you know what you're doing." Trust me, honey. I know exactly what I'm doing." She dropped her robe at an arm's touch away from me. She slowly got down on her knees, grabbed both my feet, and looked up at me from below. I was getting a boner like mad. As repulsed as I told myself to be, I wasn't. My mom wasn't your average housewife. She held a steady office job and was incredibly attractive. I'd gone through my entire schooling having my friends joke about wanting to bang my mom. "Do you like them?" Like what?" I asked, so incredibly nervous. I certainly had my voice down now."Your mother's breasts." Err... ihh..." Relax, Patrick," she put her hands on my thighs. "Now, we don't have much time, honey. Okay?" I winced. Oh my God, much time for what? "Could I take your shorts off, please?" I. Did you stay up all night again?” My nod was all I got out. “Mom says that kind of schedule will age you prematurely. That’s what she tells me. If I keep staying up late at night, I’ll get wrinkly. She might as well say, ‘Cali, go to bed or you’ll end up looking like Dag.’” She giggled. “Anyway, Mom’s heading down to the Analog and is going to order coffee for everyone, so you need to be there in—let’s see—twelve minutes. ‘Bye!” With that she skipped off down the back stairs outside my door and was gone.Makeover? Oh. Yeah. Bring money. Damn.I read somewhere that on average women who have been dumped spend $800 on a makeover. When Hope left me and cleaned out my loft, I spent $12.95 on a case of beer and didn’t change clothes for two weeks. That was the last makeover I’d had. When you do most of your work in cyberspace, who cares what color your t-shirt is?My self-image is a cross between the dark intensity of Sam Spade and the suave sophistication of Nick Charles. Really? I’m a tall,.
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