When I graduated from college and got a real job, I decided that this is a side of me that I enjoy. And since I really enjoy looking female, I should buy nice things for myself. From then on, all my lingerie must be designer (and sexy) and my clothes must be trendy, not slutty (like a real girl not a drag queen). I gave up of purging and now, I have a nice wardrobe for myself when I'm alone.I also collected a nice collection of toys along the way and a nice automatic machine. I use the toys when I'm watching x movies and pretend I'm the female actress as I reenact the scene.I had self medicated with with doses of only daily estrogen on and off at months at a time. Not much happened that I immediately noticed other than erect nipples. But after self med for a few years and compared my self to older pictures, I noticed I had loss muscle mass and my chest was a little jiggly. But I was still definitely a man. I stopped for a year and thought maybe buying overseas hormones was not a good. As I turned into the close, I slowed to a walk. The cul-de-sac was quiet with only a few lights on in the living rooms of our neighbours who were blissfully unaware of what was going to happen at the house at the end. I could just see our house past the trees. Well, it didn’t look as if there were any lights on upstairs. How long had it been? I couldn’t tell, I couldn’t see my watch in the light from the street lamps. I could feel the muscles in my legs tightening. I was still walking fast, too fast. I slowed a bit more. I hope I haven’t missed it. He could have stripped her off and be on top of her right now. I imagined them on our bed with her legs waving in the air and his bum pumping up and down between them.I was closer now. If his car was on the driveway then not even I couldn’t see it. The living room curtains were closed and the light on. I remember leaving the light on but did I close the curtains? I couldn’t remember. It appeared all quiet. Finally I got.
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