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..WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?Kindergarten Teacher: To get to the other side.Victorian Police: Give us five minutes with the chicken and we'll find out.Dr. Seuss: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told!Grandpa: In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.Plato: For the greater good.Aristotle: It is the nature of all chickens to cross roads.Karl Marx: It was a historical inevitability.Timothy Leary: Because that's the only trip the establishment would let him take.Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping50 tons of nerve gas on it.Ronald Reagan: I forgotCaptain James T. Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.Hippocrates: Because of an excess of phlegm in its pancreas.Louis Farrakhan: The road, you see, represents the black. My weapon of choice was hidden safely in my boot. Check. I smiled. I was nothing but careful, and that’s what kept me from being sent to death row. I opened the door and half stepped out, looking back at Jessica Winthrope, beloved fashion model of New York, and my fucked up mind’s latest victim. I suppose that I could tell you my name. But then I would have to kill you. Ha, just kidding. Maybe. The name plate on my desk reads ‘Lucy Morris’. But I often wonder who I really am, since I am not simply Eden Morris, a girl who manages computers and information specialists. No, I’m the unknown figure who’s splashed across the newspaper headlines and breaking news reports of New York City. I’m the infamous serial killer, who for three years has been painting blood across the city, leaving no trace of herself for police to have any leads. These are killings that have no rhyme or reason, and I’m not really trying to send any message. There is a sickness in my mind that I’ve had for my whole.
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