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I paused for a moment, quietly watching as Mila stirred. She just pulled my pillow to herself, and then sighed softly into it, as she curled up around it, never really waking up.I showered, dressed, and headed downstairs. I brewed a pot of coffee and took it and a packet of biscuits out to the patio. I sat on a wooden bench, sipping the coffee and listened to the birds in the garden. The sun was peeking over the trees at the bottom of the garden, bathing the corner of the patio. I sat in the golden glow of morning sunlight.I needed to make some decisions.Did I really want to go to Denver? Yes, but I couldn’t have timed it any worse as it was turning out. It was only supposed to be for two years, but I’d be leaving Sally behind, and having just discovered the depth of our love, I really didn’t want to leave her.Then there was Clive. Shit was I actually thinking of breaking up their marriage. I sank back in my chair, wondering what he would feel or do. Lastly, there was Mila and the. After a few months, all of us had gotten very good at judging who was going to make it and who wasn't. The new shipments would come in and we'd start betting ... not on whether or not one or the other would make it, would adapt to the new way of things, but how long it would take the ones who weren't going to adapt to die."It was that certain. We'd grown that used to spotting the signs. Protecting the weak ones wasn't an option ... there is a class of customer who prefers those weaklings. They were used and discarded and because they couldn't, or wouldn't, toughen up and fight to live, they died."Hope, friendship, love ... these are currencies, Ms. Turov. You spend them where there's a good chance of a return, because when you invest them in someone, you are investing a part of yourself ... a part you never get back. Investing a part of yourself in someone who is going to die when nothing you can do, nothing they will do, is going to change it ... it costs you more than money and.
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