Piss With Pressure

"Well, well, well, Mr. Clifton," Judge Fahey remarked, "so glad you've decided to join us. Now what is it exactly you want to charge these boys with." We busted a party at their fraternity house last night." Nothing wrong with an innocent little party, is there?" There is when they're serving alcohol to minors." We'll just have to agree to disagree on the wisdom of that particular law."The DA ignored him and went on. "I'm charging them with criminal conspiracy. I want the maximum penalty of one year in jail and a 2,500 dollar fine for each of them and I want the fraternity declared a criminal organization and disbanded."The judge rolled his eyes "They were having a party John, not running a drug cartel. I'll tell you what I'll do. Since the law was indeed broken, I have to pass sentence, so if you boys will plead guilty I'll sentence you to three months in the county jail, followed by nine months of house arrest. In place of the fine, I'll require that you perform 2,500 hours of. ‘Can I read something of yours?’ I asked, watching him pour water into an automatic coffee-maker that lookedas if it was on its last legs. ‘I mean, if you want me to.’ I was stammering, I guess, trying to appear less nervous than I was. He nodded, a bright smile turning my way. My request had pleased him, at any rate. He left the counter and disappeared into the other room for the space of a few seconds, returning with a manila folder full of paper. ‘This is all I have along the lines of erotica,’ he said as he handed it to me. I nodded and immediately set to reading while he finished making the coffee. It was good. Not great, but good. There were several things I could have suggested to help him out, but I didn’t want to appear overly critical. By the time we both had our coffee and he was seated at the table, I had decided this really was all about writing. His next statement blew my decision out of the water. ‘Does your real life resemble your writing?’ I stared, and gave.
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