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Mister Mason might have. I didn’t though I didn’t let that keep me from cutting big things into little things.Missus Mason looked over my shoulder and said, “Brad, that brings to mind a whole new picture when the words, cut up, are used in this house. Save some effort. Your finished pieces should be four times the size they are now.”That brought Karen over for a look. She grinned. Lover, you have cut up the salad veggies like you love, thoroughly and completely.” She stepped back to her mother. She said, “Mom, do you realize that man has made me faint five times from loving me!”Missus Mason blushed. “I thought Don was the only man who could do that! Isn’t it wonderful, dear?”Karen was in shock. She recovered a moment later. “Yes, mom, it’s quite wonderful!”She gave her father a quizzical look. Don simply continued to placidly cut vegetables for the salad. After a minute or so, he said, “The only thing about great performances is that women expect that they should be easily. I soon had written letters to every supplier of feminine undergarments from Lane Bryant to Omar the Tentmaker. Upon cleaning out the old PO box (under the glare of an annoyed postmaster) and carting away the resultant mass of circulars, catalogs and come-ons I began the Search For The Perfect Bra.As I spent many hours gazing at scantily clad women, a not unpleasant pastime in itself, I happily compared band thickness, color, lacy adornment, fabric, strap placement and other factors and emerged with a scientific conclusion. Lane Bryant had a half price sale on Playtex 18 hour bras that looked pretty good, so they won hands down.I soon received the goods and, lo and behold, it hugged right, supported well and left me with my hands free to do something besides adjust my bra. But it also did something else. It smelled. The darn thing was made of real, honest to goodness rubber; a heady, pungent odor that took me back through the years. There I stood once again before my mother's middle.
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