Deepali Tango Private (16.10.20)

Although there was plenty to do, both at home and in a part time volunteer job I took on, I found that I was nowhere near as active, and had started to put on more weight that I wanted. Living in the Chilterns, I decided to see more of the local countryside and started to take walks out of the town and into the hills. This week, we have been blessed by a real Indian Summer, so as the footpaths would be dry, my walk this week was one that I had wanted to do for a long while. The route took me out into the river valley and up into the hills, crossing fields now ploughed after the harvest, and though woodland. The trees were starting to turn gold, and as I reached one stretch of beech woodland, the light filtering through the trees also was gold. I’d just climbed up quite a steep path into the woods, and seeing a patch of ground in the sunlight, I sat for a while and drank some water from my bottle. It was so peaceful, just the sound of the breeze through the leaves, the coo-ing of. ‘I would have never taken Ryan away from you.’ ‘I couldn’t trust that. The track record speaks for itself.’ She walked away from him. ‘Isla, you know me. You know I would never do anything to hurt you.’ ‘I only know what the Brotherhood has taught me. I would have liked to believe that you wouldn’t have taken Ryan from me, but I couldn’t trust that.’ ‘So what makes what you did to me any different than what you feared I would do to you? You kept my child away from me, the same way you were kept from your mother.’ Isla looked away from him. He was right she had done that, but finding out she was pregnant gave her a different sense of self worth. Isla felt a connection with the baby as soon as the doctor gave the results of the blood work. There was never a question of should she keep the baby. Her grandmother had urged her to call Michael, but the fear of losing her child was the only reality she could think of. She had refused out of fear of rejection and fear of losing the only.
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