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A small place but the steak was surprisingly good. I had another couple of beers and started to relax. I had heard from my employees in my local office that women tend to marry young in Poland. They have kids in their early twenties and are divorced by the time they are thirty. It is a milf paradise so to speak, especially for foreigners like me. Not that they were looking to get married to a foreigner and leave the country. These days were long gone mainly because they felt foreigners treat women better than local men. I had no way to check if true or not, and did not really care. I am confident enough to play my game and accept both failures as well as successes. In any case, the restaurant had its fair share of typical Polish women, most of them pretty and well dressed. They were eating and chatting with their friends in a language which was totally incomprehensible to me at that time. With some I tried to make eye contact, mostly failing miserably. I got the occasional very. If we got lazy, the ranch and our future suffered. If we put more effort into it, we could see the results a short time later.The thing is we made it work. We had control over our lives, over our environment.My first slap in the face was losing Val. When he went on that survival trek and didn't come back and that damn Jimmy wasn't any help, I almost lost it. I found myself bursting into tears at the drop of a hat. And there was no way I could control it. I just cried like a baby until I was done and no amount of holding, consoling, or anything else had any effect. It was like a part of me died when he didn't come home. And of course, being his mother, there was always that nagging thought that I should have been able to do something to prevent it, even though I knew that wasn't true.The man who came out of that forest wasn't the boy I'd watched go in three months before. Bev had told me she was going to claim him years ago and had been getting her nerve up to really go for it all.
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