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She was not amused by that comment, but she was philosophical, “You can’t have everything in life. I love my work.”Both boys knew that she had sex with the other. “Let’s keep this a secret among us,” she said to them. “I don’t want any complications or cause you problems with your girl friends.”She was not unhappy with the arrangement. In her moody moments she reflected that she was like a piece of exercising equipment, to be used now and then by the boys to burn up their excess sexual energy. She didn’t mind. Much. She enjoyed sex. She wanted to be more than a sex toy, but she didn’t want to devote the time and effort needed to develop a serious relationship. “Been there, done that,” she said to herself. Moreover, men were not beating down her door. She was attractive, but not glamorous, a little mousy in fact, small-breasted, and slender. She was uncomfortable with casual chatter and flirting, an introvert who was confident and animated when talking shop, but never the life of any. I told her that we could always adopt, or get any of a number of treatments that were available now. Inwardly, I hated the shit out of her mother, for driving this situation to where it was."If you want a divorce, you can have it," she told me through her tears."I'd never leave you for anything unless you made me, Mona," I told her."My mom said, you'll cheat on me so you can have kids," she said."Mona, I'd never cheat on you, you're my life," I said.She looked me in the eye, and asked "Why would you want to stay with a fat girl that can't have kids?"I looked her back in the eyes, making sure she could watch my every expression and told her, "Because I love you, more than anything, and it would kill me to be without you."I think she calmed down a little then, and went to sleep, but to be honest those days are such a blur now that I can't remember all of the details. Two days later the clinic called and asked to see us. We sat down with a doctor and were concerned when she said that.
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