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"Now, Paddy, I'm a-gonna sit down and have me a drink." But we're privates," says Paddy."You blind, boy?" asks Mick, pointing again at his stripe. "We're LanceCorporals now!"So they have their drink, and pretty soon one of the Army lassies comes up to Mick."You're cute," she says, "and I'd like to date you, but I've got a bad case of gonorrhoea."Mick pulls his friend to the side and whispers, "Paddy, go look in the dictionary and see what Gonorrhoea means. If it's okay, give me the okay sign."So Paddy goes to look it up, comes back, and gives Mick the big Thumbs Up.Three weeks later Mick is laid up in the infirmary with a terrible case of gonorrhoea. Mick says to Paddy, "Why the hell did you give me the thumbs up?" Well Mick, in the dictionary, it say gonorrhoea affects only the privates & we're Lance Corporals now!"These are compliments of JimDISNEYLANDTwo blondes were going to Disneyland. They were driving on the Interstate when they saw the sign that said Disneyland LEFT. They. Tall, blonde, and decent muscles showed through the nice suit.And he had money. Designer sunglasses hid his emerald eyes while he drove, and when he laid them down; it was on the dash of a beautiful blueFerrari convertible.But his arrogance was overwhelming."Order whatever you want, babe," He said as he offered me the menu, then added, "I can afford anything, especially when I'm about to bag a hottie like you."About to bag me!"Salad's fine, thanks," I said when the waiter came by. I didn't want anything heavy on my stomach when I dumped this creep. It was surprising we made it through the meal at all, since the conversation was all one-track."So, those are some nice tits, toots. How big are we talking here? DD's? E's? Bigger?" Wouldn't you like to know." I said, trying to make the glacial quality of my voice apparent.He stretched, settling into his seat."Well, I guess I'll be finding out soon enough." Hereasoned.I decided to let him have it."This is our first date! What makes you so.
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