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I rustled up breakfast and was headed out the door when I realized I didn't have my wallet. No place to put it in my trunks. I was damned if I was going to carry it in my hand with a joyous pit bull dragging me on her leash, so I once again went upstairs. It was getting hot by then so I put on a pair of denim shorts - the only shorts I had clean - and once again headed downstairs. I went about three steps when I realized that the rough fabric and my tender flesh did not go well together. By the time I reached the front door I was seriously concerned for my manhood, and that, dear readers, is when inspiration struck.Talk about irony - the only way I could reasonably protect my manhood was by putting on a woman's underwear. It wasn't quite that easily accomplished, mind you. I felt like one of those cartoon characters with a devil on one shoulder and an angel on the other, fighting it out for the poor sucker's soul. To this day I can't tell you which one of them won the battle, but. That alone would have been sufficient to terminate our burgeoning relationship right when it had probably started to blossom. The other thing that came to mind, and now I was starting to understand myself better, I'd been a very 'plain vanilla' lover all those years, and now I'd begun to think that Karen had been too. I wondered if she'd 'dumbed down' for me because I was so staid.Sure we had sex, but 'we' weren't very adventurous, or maybe it was just 'me.' I had some things I would have liked that I didn't pursue with her – fellatio, cunnilingus, getting a little wilder, exhibitionism, and voyeurism, and I don't know what else. Instead, we made love twice a week, did little foreplay or after-play, never had sex more than once at a single session, and always kept body fluids to a minimum. I bet that most of the time we were in the missionary position too.I thought, 'God, how plain vanilla can you get?' I kicked myself around mentally for not being more of a leader about this stuff.
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