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It really wasn’t my fault. I wasn’t to blame. I didn’t do anything …Then, after yet another day, I recognized my continued need, craving for sexual release. That hadn’t changed, it still existed. That wasn’t my fault or my doing, either. That was Prakash’s fault for ignoring me, for thinking and caring for his business concerns more than his wife’s concerns. The craving was still real, still demanding, and they needed to be satisfied. That hadn’t changed. I needed a release. I needed stimulation for release. When, on another day, the needs and cravings were as strong as ever, I again succumbed. After seeing Prakash off to work, I returned to the bedroom and undressed completely. I stood in front of the mirror for only a minute, nodded to my reflection, and walked deliberately to the living room window where I stood for five minutes. I set the timer because I was shaking terribly and knew I would end it too soon. When the timer on my phone buzzed, I ran into the bedroom, retrieved my. I tried to get her involved with a couple of our bachelor friends; she would not go there.I finally succeeded on our trip to New Orleans during Mardi Gras. After an afternoon of walking the streets (never got my wife to flash), we stopped in a bar where we met a couple of elder widowers. By that time, my wife had had a lot to drink. Long story short, one of the guys (Herb) ended up in our hotel room; the rest is history.After her encounter with Herb, once again I tried to get something going with her and our bachelor friends; nothing doing. My next victim was our termite inspector, Alex, whom we have known for years. Alex lost his wife to cancer several years ago. My wife and I went to her funeral. It took a while for Alex to get over that. He would tell us of how much he missed her and said that he would never get into a relationship with another woman.Alex comes around every six months and about a year after his wife’s death, he started flirting more with my wife, which I told him.
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