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SDWhy were you locked up for such a long time.SAI am a stubborn man.?My wife and keyholder wanted something I was unwilling to giveher.? She informed me that my belt wasnot coming off until I gave it some serious thought. SDSo she kept you locked up all that time?? How do you perform normal functions?SAModern day chastitybelts are designed so you really do nothave to ever remove them.? One canperform all of the normal bodily functions ? urinate, defecate, take a showerand even go to beach.? However personalhygiene is a little easier if it is removed. SDWhen you walked in here, despite knowing the interviewtopic in advance, I must admit I was looking for clues, but could seenone.? How do I know you are tellingthe truth?? How do I know you arelocked in a chastitybelt.SA[Opens button on jeans and pulls waistband of FTLunderwear down a bit.]? See? ? This oneis made of fiberglass so it will not set off any metal detector devices. SDThat appears to be an impressive device ? may I see. ‘Those triceps are starting to look a little flabby,’ I said, shaking a remonstrative finger at myself. ‘Use it or lose it. You need to put in some serious military press reps.’ ‘Ah, perhaps that is true,’ I responded, ‘but one must be ever-vigilant against the dangers of overtraining. Besides,’ I told myself with a bold oratorical flourish, ‘a vintage horror movie marathon is starting forthwith.’ ‘That’s pure rationalization, you laggard. You could just record the whole thing and watch it any time.’ ‘Ah, but is the experience really the same? To view sundry creepy crawlies and irradiated space lurkers at the same time as millions of others—granted, millions of other losers, will make you part of a collective unconscious, shuddering with both fright and laughter at the stunt-man-in-a-rubber-suit special effects. Do you really want to engage in a dumbed-down media consumption experience, watching some digitized, reconstituted version of the broadcast after the fact?’ ‘It’s all digital.
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