Kiara Hindu – With Face

He said that he wanted to make love to me but I said that I couldn’t do that as I wasn’t ready for it and we didn’t even know each other properly. So, he got angry at me and tried to force me to make love with him. I started crying and seeing this, he stopped. But he was still angry and called me bad names and said that he didn’t like me at all in the first place and that I was ugly and unless and other bad names. I quickly got out of the car and went home. I was very upset because what had happened.I just wanted to go to my room and cry alone. My mom saw me upset and asked me if something was wrong. I said ‘no, nothing’ and just went to my room. I kept thinking about what had happened and what he had said. I cried a lot and thought that I was indeed ugly and useless ant that I was wasting my life or something, as I wasn’t like the other girls. I felt very sad and I couldn’t sleep.After a few hours when everyone had gone to sleep, someone knocked at my door, I asked who it was and it. I even love you in some ways, but I don’t love you the way a wife should love her husband.’ Lexi stopped to dry the tears running down her cheeks. ‘We only married because of our responsibility to the baby, but when we lost our son the reason for us being together was lost too. I’ve been thinking a lot about us since I got home from the hospital. And as much as I like and respect you, I don’t want to settle for anything but real love in my marriage.’ ‘Lexi you know I care for you and I think we could be good together,’ I interrupted. Remember that sinking feeling? Well it was back, I didn’t want her to go. ‘I know and I care for you too, but it’s not enough for either of us. If the baby had lived we might have made a good life together. My dad is coming to pick me up and then I’m going to go live with my aunt in Washington State. Please don’t hate me James.’ Those were her final words and she kissed me on the cheek as she went to answer her father’s knock at the door. John helped.
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