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Goodbye, Jennifer."His words sounded so final and she watched a tear run down his cheek. She had hurt him deeply. She felt awful. She had hurt the one person she loved more than any other in this world. She was almost numb when he stopped talking and she stared at him in shock. He looked so sad; she wanted to hug him but before she had a chance he stood up and walked out of the trailer.She lay there staring at the door for a brief moment in complete surprise — she had to have him in her life. She jumped out of bed quickly and found her robe. She pulled it on as she ran through the trailer then dashed out the door. Dave's car was sitting in front of his family's trailer and her heart jumped into her throat as she ran towards it. She suddenly realized it was empty and she saw his family van pulling away up the clay road.Tears ran down her cheeks as she waved at the departing van to stop. Surely Dave would look back. The van kicked up a cloud as it moved up the lane and as the dust. Like a well-formed cup you could just dream of sipping from... or drinking deep.I worry a little if she looks in that mirror and doesn’t see the same thing. She has a great eye for beauty. How does she see that girl in the mirror and not fall completely head over heels in love with her? I don’t know. I can only guess. More than one beautiful woman can see everyone’s beauty but her own. Especially women who have had disordered eating, or whose families put too much emphasis on appearance.I mean, appearance is great and all, but it’s not the same thing as self-worth. What if she were fat or ugly? Imagine it for a moment. She’d still be one of God’s children, she’d still have that creative eye, radiant intelligence, instinct to live brightly, to seek ‘freedom of the mind and freedom of identity’. I certainly hope I’d still be texting with her.Anyway beauty at its best is not so much cause as effect. You don’t get self-esteem from being beautiful! The other way around can happen. One.
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