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About the way I was living.And behaving.My parents would never have understood. Or even recognized me. During that time.Sex. And drugs. And rock and roll. There was fighting in the street. I was a street-fightin' man. I was living a songwriter's dream.Marching and getting maced and looking at Hell's Angels dressed up as "security" and crying for the fallen here at home and cursing the fallen across the sea in another world and then going back to our little places to drink and eat and smoke and lose ourselves in sweat and saliva and secretions.Am I remembering?I think so.Nothing succeeds like excess. And I excelled at excess.A dozen or so of us in a small 2-bedroom apartment, a few in the kitchen fixing dinner for all of us, the rest in the main room, no lights on, candles everywhere. Groups of two or three on the couch, on the floor, in front of the dark television. On the closet floor.The music loud, a faint blue-white haze near the ceiling, Jimi and Janis, Airplane and The Lizard. A mistake. Crying and saying stop. I drove for a while , argued. swore at her. Called her names and accused her of everything. She said she was sorry. Very sorry and would do anything for forgiveness . I stopped the car, it was a dark lane, in the countryside, I walked round to her side of the Range rover. Opened the door and pulled her out. Still crying and protesting. I turned her round, lifted up her dress. She was wearing expensive shoes, stockings and suspenders. I bent her over the seat, pulled her pants down and pushed my cock against her, it went straight in. She was soaking wet. I started slow, then speeded up, harder and harder, holding her waist and pounding my cock in , balls deep. Harder and harder, till I came. I pulled up my trousers and got back in, and drove home. When we got home, she came in, still talking, still explaining, still apologising. She followed me into the living room, I turned her round , undid the zip on her dress, pulled it down and off her. She.
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