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” “Talking of bodies, you could always put on one of those things you got from the sex toys catalogue,”he said, “That’d work.”“Fine, and what about you? You haven’t got any leopard skin, split crotch, posing pouches,” she said.“Um, you know me, I just hang my dick out.”“That’s okay if there’s no one else around or the curtains are closed, but you can’t just flop it out in the middle of the supermarket now can you?”“No, but you can’t go round the supermarket in your sex shop gear either. So we’ve both got to be a bit sensible about this,” he said.She suddenly burst into giggles and started clutching her sides.“Sorry,” she said, “I just had a mental image of you in the supermarket with your dick flopped out on the checkout conveyor belt, and running along with it to try and keep up with the belt. Meanwhile the checkout girl’s reaching out to grab it and wave it over the bar code reader!”He smiled as the image formed itself in his mind as well. “Wonder how many loyalty points I’d get for. “Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls, welcome again to our wedding ceremony. We are delighted to celebrate the joining together of Lauren and Father Michael as Lauren enters into the body of the church, freely and willingly, so that she too might continue its teaching and work throughout the world. Today, we will, by the union of their bodies, confirm our belief that all things are pre-ordained and that fate is our master. We will also confirm our belief that we are helpless in the hands of fate, and therefore abdicate our concern and responsibility over to fate itself.”Lauren’s heart raced. Her palms were sweaty as she held her hands together in front of her. Her smile slowly left her lips as the now familiar words rolled out into the night, only time stood between her and further abuse by the priest. Simone handed her a card containing the words of the ceremony and the responses expected of her.“Lauren, do you freely and gladly consent to be joined with Father Michael in the.
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