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I slipped inside her with astonishing ease. As I began to thrust in and out, I ever so briefly mulled something over. It had taken me a second run through life to find out what I really wanted, what I really craved. In my other life, I'd been with many women. Those deeply flawed relationships – which included two failed marriages – had skewed my views in so many ways. In actuality, I'd been trying way too hard, and the frustration had rendered me jaded and shallow. But with Inez, from the beginning of our relationship, everything had been simple and easy. She fit me like a glove, and it hadn't taken me long to realize that I wanted to take hold of her, and never let go. I'd never felt anything like that before.Maybe there had been a purpose to my being sent back in time, after all.Before long, I was pouring forth into her womb. I collapsed on top of her, telling her again and again how much I loved her. The sensation was overwhelming; we just laid there, for what seemed be an endless. Knees to chest, looking out the window I finally allowed my mind to settle on the significance of what was about to occur. I loved you in every way possible and then some, and yet as I sat in my lingerie, looking out at the stars, I couldn’t push away all the fears. I wanted this to be perfect for you. I knew if you thought you’d hurt me or caused me pain in any way, it would ruin it, but from what I’d heard from friends, the first time generally hurt. I was afraid that I wouldn’t be good enough sexually, to make our marriage work and be worthwhile for you to remain committed to. What if we were only supposed to be best friends and being together like this would never work? Would you tell me if you were unhappy, or would you suffer for years until you couldn’t handle it anymore? Most everyone that I knew had said that girl on top was the best way for your first time, just because you had more control, but other than lowering myself onto you at my speed, I had no idea what to do.
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