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Maybe I would spend the night up watching Gilmore Girls on DVD, crying into a tub of ice cream. That would certainly be cliché enough, and it was my plan as I got out of bed and turned on the light. But as I flicked on my light and reached for a shirt to fend off the night's cold, a photo caught my eye. It was of me and my friend Carrie, arms around each other, smiling with surprising sincerity. Her girlfriend that week (I'm barely exaggerating when I'm saying that she had a different girlfriend every week, proving that lesbians can be just as sluttish as any straight girl — not that that's a bad thing) was a remnant on the edge of the photograph. Cropped out.And I remembered an offer, made in painful earnestness, a few years ago when we were in college.Listen Natasha, I know you're straight as a ruler and all that, but if you ever change your mind ... and I do mean any time ... give me a call.She had confessed she loved me back then, barely holding back tears, and I felt as though I. "Cindy, of course you can talk to me. I'll do what I can but it has been a long time since I've been out on a date." I laughed, trying to lighten the mood. I knew it would all be about love or having a crush which are not my favorite topics."Mike, my boyfriend, he tried to touch me tonight. You know, he pushed his hand in my bra and touched my breasts, even my nipples. But I don't want that, it didn't feel right."Now I was interested, and I thought "lucky Mike for getting a feel", but out loud I said "Why do you think it didn't feel right?" Well, you see Mr Matthews..." she paused and I saw that her cheeks were growing red. She was blushing.She started again, averting her eyes, "Well, you see I'm not a virgin. I did have sex once about a year ago but it was awful. The boy at the time was horrible. It hurt, and I felt so cheap afterward. I hated it. And I don't want to do that again, I don't want another boy doing that to me."She sobbed as she spoke, her head bowed and obviously upset.
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