With You It Is Always Perfect To Make Love - I...

00.’Me: ‘Here you are. OK now, what’s the wifi password?’Bartender: ‘ “youneedtobuyadrinkfirst”; No spaces and all lowercase.’----Prince Harry’s Bachelor Party - Quote of the DayIt’s really weird stuffing money into a stripper’s G string when every bill has a photo of your grandmother printed on it.”Compliments of technomage‎Unitarian Universalist jokesQ: What do you get when you cross a UU with a Jehovah’s Witness?A: Someone who knocks on your door for no apparent reason.You May Be A Unitarian Universalist If... you think socks are too formal for a Summer serviceyou think the Holy Trinity is “reduce, reuse and recycle”when you watch Jaws you root for the shark (“Hey, sharks have to eat too!”)you think “Whatever” is a valid theological pointyou think a Holy day of Obligation is your turn to bring coffee hour treatsyou know at least two people who are upset that trees had to die for your church to be built.Q: What is a Unitarian Universalist?A: Someone who believes in life before. I stopped as soon as I could, and sprayed water on the glass to wash my spunk off. I sneaked a glance at her to see if she had noticed. Oh, yes! Her eyes were on my spunk, but she looked up at me, finished peeing and put her clothing in order.'Don't worry, dear, ' she said as she left the room.It was a bit of a surprise – the fact that she wasn't taking it badly. I expected a bollocking, for wanking, but all I got was a smile and a "don't worry".The rest of the day was perfectly normal, or what passes for normal in our house. It was the start of the summer school holidays, so there wasn't any homework. Dad had muttered something about getting a job, but you can't just find a job these days, like he could when he was my age. Danni and Rachel were in their room. They spoke in low voices, so I couldn't hear them, even when I pressed my ear against their door. I expect they were plotting and scheming, or talking about clothes. I went to my room and booted up the PC. Spent half an hour.
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