By then I had fourteen hides nailed up on the side of the barn and I no longer felt guilty about killing them. There was a farm two miles down the road where I got fresh eggs and I saw what coyotes had done to some of her hens. It wasn't like they had nothing else to eat. There was plenty of game around. They just went for the easy stuff, which usually mean they went for what humans owned.While I played great white hunter, Lynne and Jill put a lot of work into the orchard, taking it much more seriously than they ever had before. Lynne studied the common problems, like apple scab and aphids and such, and the ways that organic farmers dealt with them. In the past there had been plenty of apples for all the critters to share in. That changed when she got serious about making a profit on them.Jill put a lot of time into developing further markets and by the time we started picking, instead of driving a pickup load of apples to the farmer's market (something Jill had been dreaming of. Over the course of the day, she got worse and worse, shutting me out and then deciding to move back in with her parents. I’m told by the girls that she was more and more direct in comparing me to her rapists. She won’t be back.”There was a moment of silence around the room and I decided to close the door on the idea of forgiving her. “I offered her the letter she wrote to me. I told her that if those words were no longer true that there was no reason for me to hold onto them any more. She took the letter, telling me that she doesn’t love me, at least not any more. Maybe she never did and fooled herself into thinking she did. Either way, she’s gone and she’s not coming back. She can get in line behind Zoe if she wants a reprieve.”“That bad, huh?” Hanna winced in sympathy.“They both compared what we were doing to rape. Zoe said you were raping me, Cheryl was comparing me to her treatment at the hands of the Watermans. Of the two, I have more sympathy for Zoe. She was at least speaking.
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