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It was on the lot and I got a good deal on it for cash. I could borrow money better than they offered.Fiona fell in love with the Venza. They had a four cylinder model on the lot in Sunset Bronze and it was over before she got it off the lot for the test drive. It had plenty of power, plenty of room, looked rich as hell, and had all of the bells and whistles she would want. The list was just over twenty-eight thousand, but with some aggressive haggling (by Fiona of course) she got a ridiculously large amount for her Taurus and the deal was done. Between the trade in and a hefty down payment made possible by her January commission check, her monthly payments would be well within her budget.The cars wouldn't be prepped and available until Monday, but it didn't matter. Fiona was on a high and I was the recipient of an enthusiastic bedroom session that night. We kept the noise down so as not to alert Tina. I had no idea if she could hear anything. If things went the way I was beginning. The mom asks, “Why on earth do you need that?”The little boy replies, “isn’t that what you give daddy when HIS shit won’t get hard?!”This compliments of Mario MComplaints to wife and replyTo My Dearest Wife,During the past year, I have attempted to make love to you 365 times. I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of only once every 10 days. The following is a list of why I didn’t succeed more often:We will wake the kids - 54 timesIt’s too late - 15 timesI’m too tired - 42 timesIt’s too early - 12 timesIt’s too hot - 18 timesPretending to be asleep - 31 timesThe neighbors will hear - 9 timesHeadache or backache - 26 timesSunburn - 10 timesYour mother will hear us - 9 timesNot in the mood - 21 timesWatching the late show - 17 timesToo sore - 26 timesNew hairdo - 6 timesWrong time of the month - 14 timesYou had to go to the bathroom - 19 timesOf the 36 times that I DID succeed, the result was not always satisfying because 6 times you just laid there, 8 times you reminded me that.
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